John II

“I guess you could say I’m just picky” was John’s response.

Really? Picky? You’re 42. If you were really single you would have met The One 4 times over.

“Picky how?” I ask.

His response? The classic: “Well… No one has been right”.  Okay. Vague enough.

Now more than the typical Q&A  I tend to trust an individuals reactions to statements and conversation.  So I get into a little story:

“Got it. I know what you mean. It’s tough. You have it easy being a man at least”

“How so?” he asks.

“Well, you know how women are… We are always on the hunt for a man, and often over look little red flags here and there to try to make something work”

“You’re right about that!” His response is very enthusiastic. He obviously lives by stereotype. This is going to be easier than I thought.

“Seriously!” I continue on “my best friend totally fell for this one guy who worked near us. He was charming, funny, took her out on the town, made her feel like a princess, the works…. Too bad for her he turned out to be married.”

John paused for a moment before asking “what do you mean?”

“I mean he was married. Like with a house and a wife and kids living out in the sticks. His wife was apparently alright with it though. I guess some people just have an understanding in their marriages”

John is rather quiet at this point. “Well that’s sad” he replied.

“I agree, I wonder how someone gets to that point. It isn’t like you expect that walking down the aisle on your wedding day.”

“No. I wouldn’t think so”… It got quiet, and I actually start feeling bad for him at this point. If there wasn’t a motive behind this conversation it would seem like a normal lull in conversation. There was a motive though, he didn’t know it but it was there and I could see the sadness on his face. The room was heavy. It was as if someone came in and sucked all of the oxygen out. My heart began beating heavily as I wondered: Why? He looks so upset when confronted with the idea of being unfaithful… He wasn’t being attacked or judged (that he knew at least) and yet he looked like someone just ran over his favorite puppy. If this is such a troubling idea or situation for him, why does he do it? He must have some love for his wife or else he wouldn’t be so affected. Or does he have children? Is the idea of breaking his little girls heart by betraying her mother what really troubles him?

Deciding to lighten the mood I ask him how he fills up his free time and he goes on to tell me he enjoys going to the gym, reading, watching Fox News and his beloved Detroit Tigers. Then he mentions, with a smirk on his face “I do have a little secret hobby.”

 “Secret hobby? That sounds fun!” I’m wondering what the heck he’s talking about

“Want me to fill you in?”

“Of course!”

“I don’t know that you’ll be into it” what the hell does he mean? Not into it? Wanting to know more I hid my confusion, looked him dead in the eye, smiled and said “Well I haven’t come across anything I haven’t wanted to try at least once”. He stood up, which totally baffled me. We were talking, why would he get up? He walked into the bathroom/den/laundry room/closet/whatever the hell you would call that thing and comes out with a canvas bag. Immediately I thought the worst… He collects knives. Or fingers, he’s going to cut my fingers off and the knives he will use are in that bag.